Why did I start a blog (again)?

How many things have you started and quit?

By the end of this article, I hope you'll get the courage to build that thing (again).

They say that if you look back at your childhood for memorable experiences, you will find your passion. The thing you did that put you in a state of flow.

I drew a lot when I was a kid. I quit in Grade 9 when I saw other people better than me, though. I wish I hadn't, but I seem to have trouble sticking to things.

I quit learning Wing Chun (a Chinese martial art). I quit piano. I quit blogging. I quit building two YouTube channels. I 've also quit my original career in accountancy.

I am, in all those respects, a quitter, but there was one thing I always gravitated towards. No matter what I quit, I always moved on to some new thing that required writing.

I wrote essays and stories throughout school. When I became a teacher, I started writing lesson plans and PowerPoints (yes, I hated it). When I wanted to start a side hustle, I landed on blogging, then content creation, then copywriting, then blogging again, then YouTube (which had scripts), then Kindle book publishing, then YouTube again and now I'm sitting here while everyone is asleep writing a blog post.

But this time it's different.

For the last decade, I've always chased the new tactic, the best hooks, the "way" to succeed to no avail. In between books, gurus, and A.I., I don't think I've ever actually listened to myself. I don't think I've ever tried to chart my own path.

Latching onto the opinions of others in an attempt to be successful is ironic because it just showed how much I cared about the opinions of others. Don't get be wrong. Opinions are helpful, but they are not absolute. Latching onto the opinions of others relieves us of our need to take responsibility. After all, if I fail. I only failed because the advice didn't work. When in reality, it's you who didn't work.

That is why this blog is an attempt to be unapologetically me (with all the vulnerability, stories, lessons) because I, like you, want to figure out how to live this life well on my own terms.

When I was in grade seven, I spent weeks writing a 40 page fantasy epic (20,000 words). It didn't feel like weeks, though. I got lost in the world I created, drawings and all. Needless to say, my teacher was blown away, and it became the proudest moment of my childhood. That moment stands right next to scoring a half court basketball shot as the last kid standing during a dodgeball game and reviving my whole team. Yes, we won. 😄

As an adult, I no longer get lost. At least I appear that way. That doesn't mean I've found my way, though. Adulthood is filled with responsibility, and there's a real irrational fear that one wrong turn may jeopardize more than you intended.

That's why the older you get, the less society rewards your divergent decisions. After all, most would rather The Moon and Sixpence remain fiction. There's a well-worn and beaten path. Suppress your individuality and take it. Stay safe and secure.

As children, we're happy with exploration. Every experience is novel. Being lost is exciting. Somewhere along the line, novel experiences became risks, and being lost meant that you didn't "have it together."

My best guess is that it has something to do with car payments, mortgages, marriage, kids, or the looming realization that you're always a moment closer to nothingness. The good news is life isn't that black and white. All the items above can either build you up or tear you down.

I am fortunate enough to be experiencing the former.

That's why when few days ago, one of my students told me directly I should start a blog, I was surprised but happy. I was surprised because though I always believed I had important messages to share, I've never experienced it til that moment. I was happy because being told directly was like getting the wake up call I knew I needed.

Maybe there's someone waiting to hear my message. Maybe someone is waiting for you, too.

What's one thing you've always wanted to create but have not yet for one reason or another?

Start (or continue) that thing now. Create your reality. Recognize that while feedback is good, feedback is not absolute. Lean into your ability to form opinions, to course correct. Have a positive opinion of yourself so you can actually listen to yourself.

It's 11:50PM. Cheers to our bias towards action.